Uncle Al on Joan Baez

"Man, Joan Baez...what a drag."
(clearly alan was not a fan of folk music in the 60s)

Rusty

In my days at the Hellmouth, I worked with a certain dredlocked hunk named Russ. During our time together Rusty came out. I personally believe that I have excellent gaydar (well, for gay men. sadly i am clueless regarding the ladies.) but I so didn't see that conversation coming. He actually said that he was waiting for a guy to come in to the café that a friend of his was setting him up with. I was insanely confused. Why would meeting a friend of a friend be considered a set up? That just didn't sound right. It got to a point where I literally said, "Dude, are you telling me that you're gay???" He said yeah and I was speechless. Come the end of the night I still was not convinced. I mean this guy was so straight. Like an arrow. Like a motherfuckin' board. So I finally just said, "Rusty, man, I know we only met like a coupla weeks ago, but, are you sure you're gay? I mean, I just don't see it. I could walk in on you fuckin' some guy on this table and be all, 'Rusty, quit playin'!' because I just can't get my head around it." That's when he dropped the bomb and said plainly, "Rusty likes cock." Well alrighty then.

Jack from "Will & Grace"

"He's clinging to it like he's Kirstie Alley and the class is a shred of decency." Ouch.

Wayne Disses Stargate Gal

My three brothers are huge Sci-Fi geeks and were all about the series Stargate last year. Wayne was telling me of one character who is a little too smart for her own good and thus really irritating. "She makes Leonardo DaVinci look like a garbage man," Wayne rants, "It's like she knows everything. It's so annoying. It'll be like, 'Well, back when I was a tennis pro...' or 'When I went to culinary school...' It's like she has the answer to any problem at her fingertips and it's completely unbelievable and ridiculous and annoying. Ah..."

Creed Bratton

On Jan's tub birth, "Must've looked like the tide at Omaha beach."

Out to Dinner w/Amy & Her Mama

Not long ago the three of us had a great opportunity to have lunch together. We hit a pizza joint near Mary's office and had more than a couple laughs. At one point the kid behind me kept making fart noises (how inappropriate) and I said, "Someone's a little gassy..." expecting a grin or a chuckle from Amy. Instead Mary very seriously stated, "It's just a boy playing." (Lead balloon.) So, I was speechless b/c clearly I was aware of that, but Amy in her usual sarcastic way replied, "Oh, that's not a real fart? Star, get with the program."
Whatever, I thought it was funny.

Silly

Do you know why six is afraid of seven?
Because seven ate nine.