Mr. Schnell

Back at the Hellmouth, there was a fabulous old coot who had a colourful way of describing the customers. Specifically it was the ones that wanted to purchase only the newest fad book, like the Oprah book club books or The DaVinci Code. As if heaven forbid they should veer out on their own and choose a selection that spoke to them. These people, as Schnell pointed out to me, were fucking lemmings who were "as useless as fucking clown shoes." And what could be more useless than clown shoes?
It should be noted that Schnell could never, ever pass up a sale of any kind. A week after Halloween one year he was in Rite Aid and cleaned them out of monster slammer stuffed animal heads. They went down to 90% off and it's how I acquired my Frankenstein and Wolfman slammers. Thanks again, Schnell!