'Tis the Season??

This time of year always reminds me of a horrifying story Melissa once told me. When she and I first met, Melissa was dating, oh, let's call him Orville; well, on their first Christmas together, Melissa wanted to get a little something for his mother, so she picked out a sweet little angel figurine. Caught unawares, Mother's expression let on that she had nothing to reciprocate. A normally sane woman would lie through her teeth and say something like, "Oh, I haven't wrapped yours yet!" or "Drats, your gift hasn't arrived yet!" She could have even been honest and explained that she didn't realize they were exchanging gifts. Any of those would have been acceptable. But Orville's mom went with, "Oh, um, uh, I have your gift...but it's upstairs. Let me run and get it." As Orville and Melissa sat waiting they could hear the sound of paper rustling and stumbling around as if to find something to wrap up and give. Again, a normal person would take a frame from the wall, remove the photo, and wrap it on up. No, that was not the case in this scenario. Orville's mother came downstairs after nearly fifteen minutes with an oblong item in her hand, wrapped in wrinkled reindeer paper. Intrigued, Melissa opened the package to reveal...a Hickory Farms turkey stick. Well, y'know, it's the thought that counts, right?